Who: KJ Dell’Antonia

Claim To Fame: KJ Dell’Antonia is a former New York Times reporter who wrote and edited the Motherlode blog from 2011-2016 and was a contributing editor to the Well Family section from 2016-2017. In addition, KJ is the co-host of the #AmWriting podcast along with parenting expert Jessica Lahey, author of The Gift of Failure, and she is the author of How To Be A Happier Parent, a solution-packed primer drawing on her years of researching, reporting, and writing on how parents can find more happiness and joy in their day to day lives.

Where To Find KJ: Her Website, Amazon, Twitter

Praise For KJ: “Parenting expert KJ Dell’Antonia draws on the latest research to find ways to make life happier with her family of four children. She’s candid (and often hilarious) about her own struggles, and her wise, practical advice for tackling common pain points such as chores, homework, sibling squabbles, devices, and discipline rings true, because she’s tried it all herself.” — Gretchen Rubin, author of the New York Times bestseller The Four Tendencies

When and where do you like to write? Are you the same-thing-every-day kind of writer or can you write anytime, anywhere?

Most of the time, I write first. Ideally, that means I drop off whatever kids are going wherever they’re going, and at 8:10 or so I come home, take my phone into the bedroom to charge it, then sit down in my spot in our living room and write until I hit the day’s goals. (I get up a lot to refill my coffee.)

Do you have any pre-writing rituals or habits before you sit down to write?

I put my phone somewhere else, and I disconnect the computer from the Internet.

Do you struggle at all with that dreaded enemy of writing: writer’s block? Do you think such a thing exists?

I don’t, no. I had daily deadlines for five years. I can get some words to come. They may not be the best words, but they’ll be words, and then I can do something with them.

All of your work is very research intensive. What is your method for researching and organizing material that you might want to use for your future writing?

I’m writing fiction now, so this doesn’t really apply to me.

Writers have to be master prioritizers — juggling all sorts of projects, responsibilities, and deadlines at the same time. That’s certainly the case for you. Do you have any methods for managing tasks and time so to not let overwhelm sneak in?

I block my time, I make realistic lists of what needs to be done on a day, and I tend to choose no more than two non-writing areas of focus per day. For example, the podcast takes two days a week on average, and then another day might be spent working on promotion, my website, things like that.

In addition to everything else, you run an amazing podcast. How has your podcast helped your writing? How has your writing helped your podcast?

The podcast helps us meet inspirational writers who keep us motivated—and our new Writer Top 5s (like Top 5 Ways to Dictate Your Work, Top 5 Resource Books for Fiction Writers) push us to talk about what we’ve learned over the years, remind us of things that worked in the past that we might want to go back to, and encourage us to look for and learn new things we can share with listeners. And the whole thing keeps me honest. If I’m telling you I turn off my Internet every day, I better do it. If I tell you I only do email once a day or so, I better not be sending you six emails at different times all day.

What does a successful writing day mean for you? And how do you finish out a day of writing? Do you have a process, or is it just that you know you’ve hit a natural stopping point?

I set goals, usually for the week, that fit the way I need to work (revise a chapter, write 1000 words, sit with the outline for 2 hours). And I usually stop when I hit the goal, even if I’m on a roll, because it gives me somewhere to start for next time—and because I have limited focus time, and I’ve usually allocated it all one way or another. But that’s writing. I have trouble stopping doing all the rest of it—the emails, the promotion, the scheduling emails, planning podcasts, planning work time. I’m trying to declare a “shut down” time every day, but it hasn’t been going great. Too often I lose an afternoon and then feel like I need to work in the evening.

What books or writers have most influenced the way you think and the way you write?

Stephen King’s On Writing. Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic. Steven Pressfield’s everything, Laura Vanderkam’s everything.

What is your advice to aspiring writers?

You can’t start any younger, so start now, and a lot of people say they want to write a book (or an essay, or a memoir, or anything really). A lot of people start writing. So ABF. Always Be Finishing. And you’ll be way ahead of the game.

___________

Ready to create a writing routine of your own?

Sign up now and receive our free guide “12 Essential Writing Routines To Help You To Craft Your Own.”

Learn from the routines of superstar authors Stephen King, Gertrude Stein, John Grisham, Ernest Hemingway, Neil Gaiman, and many more.

Get the free guide here!